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Spinach, Red Onion, and Salmon Protein Pizza

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Don’t you just it LOVE when you walk into a store looking for a present for someone and, instead, you end up buying something AWESOME – for yourself? It happens to me all the time.Some might wince at this admission, thinking that I shouldn’t disclose what is ostensibly a negative trait, especially not in a public forum. “And you also shouldn’t celebrate that habit, Anna Sward! The fact that you go out shopping for other people and end up just buying stuff for yourself doesn’t reflect too well on your person” +/- “shame on you, young lady.”

Beh, I say to this. I don’t think the fact that I get stuff for myself means that I’m in some way inconsiderate. It doesn’t mean that I’m indifferent to the needs (or wants) of others either. Heck, people always say I give pretty good gifts. So what if it takes me a few shops (and several gifts to myself) to get there? Hehe, it’s a process.

But you’re probably wondering what all this has to do with pizza. You’re probably wanting to know where the pizza is. Did I lure you into reading a (pretty boring, let’s be honest) journal-type post under the pretence of… a pizza? What deceit! This is trickery of the lowest kind! I mean, hey, you clicked here to learn how to make this protein pizza. And here you area instead, reading about my tendency to buy stuff for myself.

Before you click away though (feeling scandalized and cheated),  let me tell you that all this yadi yadiya actually RELATES to the pizza.

You see, I walked into a gift shop to buy a birthday gift for my friend and, instead, I bought a pizza cruncher for myself. I didn’t end up getting a gift for my friend, not yet, but you know what? I’m going walk into that shop again tomorrow and buy him a pizza cruncher too.

Considered this way, my purchase could be read, not an act of selfishness, but as an altruistic act – in the sense that I HAD to try it for myself before I bought it for my friend (because I couldn’t get him something untested, could I?) It’s kind of like when you make some cookies for someone else and you end up eating a few – to TEST them, of course. How else could you know they were good, right?

See how we can turn the reading of a seemingly selfish action on its head and make it something positive? It’s not the manipulation of truth, it’s just its repositioning. And better yet, now that I bought the cruncher, I can tell YOU about it. So what began as an apparently self-serving action can now be seen as a public service… of sorts. BOOM! Right? So welcome to this recipe. Let me tell you about the this cruncher and then break into song the recipe:

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I’d SEEN pizza crunchers (aka pizza pans) before but I never actually considered buying one until today. It was pretty cheap and I was planning on making a protein pizza later today anyways so I bought it.

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If you want to buy one try amazon? The thing is really cool! What it does is basically aireate your pizza crust to ensure it cooks throughout. This is amazing for me because I used to always bake my pizzas on a baking tray. The problem with that though is that the air doesn’t come through the bottom and the base ends up considerably less crispy. With the cruncher though, waaaaaa! The base cooks beautifully! If you’re a pizza-snob like me (is that a word?), I urge you to try one. They’re amazing. But OK, enough from me, let’s do the recipe continue the conversation:


1/2 cup liquid egg whites
1/4 cup pea protein
1/4 cup buckwheat (or oat) flour
1 tbsp onion granules (optional but tasty)
1/4 cup of milk (I used almond but any will do)


1. Blend everything together until you get a brown gloopy-looking batter.

2. Spread this batter on a hot hot hot nonstick pan, further nonsticked with some coconut oil, PAM, or another low-cal spray.

3. Pour your batter on the pan and spread the mix around with a spatula to cover as much as the base as possible. Turn the heat from hot hot hot to medium.

4. Flip it once the bottom has cooked to cook the other side.

5. Add your toppings to it, beginning with tomato paste, veggies, meets, and finally your cheese.

6. Grill in an oven broiler or grill.

7. Slice and MUNCH!

Macros per base: 341kcals, 44g protein, 33g carbs and 3g fat.

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